


Just one more drink...

by Sunja



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alcohol, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-05
Updated: 2016-01-05
Packaged: 2018-05-11 23:37:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5645956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sunja/pseuds/Sunja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony is sick of fighting his friends.<br/>Set during the upcoming Civil War movie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just one more drink...

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there, I'm new on this website and even though this is not my first fanfiction it is my first english one. You have been warned.   
> I'd be really happy about any feedback, so feel free to leave a comment :)

Tony looked at the drink in his hands.  
He should stop drinking.   
He emptied the glass and refilled it.   
He should really stop drinking.   
Tony sighed, emptied the glass again and resisted the urge to pour himself another drink.   
He felt terrible and that wasn’t only a consequence of all the alcohol he had consumed in the last few days to get a few precious hours of sleep. That wasn’t the problem, that was merely a very unprofessional attempt at finding a solution. To drink until he forgot the problem. He had always overcome the hard times. But the hard times weren’t that bad, not really anyway. Bad was when you finally climbed out that deep, dark hole and thought you had left all your problems behind you, only to be thrown down again. That was how Tony felt and the hole was deeper and darker then ever.   
He had another drink.  
No, the alcohol really wasn’t the problem. The problem was, that he was stuck in a fight he couldn’t win. A fight that he would lose, even if he won. A fight against his teammates. People with whom he had saved the world over and over again, people that he trusted with his life. And now they were fighting against each other.  
Tony carefully felt the bruise on his cheek.   
He still remembered exactly the way it hat felt when Steve had punched him there.   
Why couldn’t Steve see that he was fighting for a lost cause? That Steve wanted to save Bucky Tony could understand, but the law was the law and nobody could escape it. Why couldn’t Steve accept that? Why did Steve block every try Tony made to negotiate a peace, why couldn’t Steve see how much Tony hated fighting him?  
Tony tried to stand up, but he felt a sudden stab of pain in his leg and he decided to stay seated.   
The world thought he was a hero who did what was right without hesitating and Tony did his best to uphold that image, but it was far from the truth. Tony knew he was doing the right thing, but the doubt was there in the depth of his mind, now and then coming to the surface. He knew that the law was the only option left but how could it be right when Captain America was against it? How could this law be so logical but still the one man with the strongest morality of them all was against it?  
Tony let his head fall back and thought of all the good times he had had with Steve. It was no secret that they had often had different opinions and had often fought because of it but they had also been friends and Tony smiled when he remembered how often they had argued only to forgive and forget within minutes.   
Tony knew that in the past he had often been the one who was wrong when he argued with Steve, he had kept things from him because he knew Steve wouldn’t approve. But this time he knew he was right. And even Steve would come to see this, Tony just wondered at what price. How often would he have to fight his best friend until he realized Tony was right?  
Tony sighed when he thought about their last fight. He had confronted Steve and opened his helmet to talk to him. Steve had exchanged a few words with him but his voice had been cold and distanced. Tony knew that voice. It was Steve’s soldier voice. He used it in moments of „eat or be eaten“ and those were rarely the case anymore in the lives of the Avengers. Tony had never expected to hear Steve talk to him this way. Despite o fit Tony had tried to negotiate. He had pushed his disappointment aside and had hidden his true feelings behind a facade of witty replies and humor that he always used when he was nervous or afraid. And then they had talked but it had been obvious from the beginning that they wouldn’t come to terms. At least not this way. So eventually they had started fighting. And now Tony was sitting here with a black eye and a bunch of bruises and he was sick of fighting. He wanted it all to stop, he wanted everything to go back to the way it used to be but he knew that was never going to happen.   
So he played his game, ignored the part of him that was shouting in his mind that he couldn’t fight against his friends and instead focused on seeing the others as lawbreakers, as the enemy. He made witty comments the way he had always done and pretended it was totally normal to fight one’s friends. And it worked. Rhodey and Natasha seemed to believe his act and on some days he even convinced himself that everything was fine.   
And then he came home and was alone. And then came the doubts. In those moments Tony distracted himself by working on his suits or he came up with plans to capture Steve or he thought about what he would do after all this was over but the dark thoughts always caught up to him. Every day that the fighting lasted the feeling in Tony’s gut solidified, the feeling that told him that there would be casualties before all this was over. And even though Tony hated this thought, he knew that in the end it would be Steve or him. If one of them surrendered the fighting would be over, if one of them died… either it would end the conflict for good or the person would become a martyr and his colleagues would only fight harder.   
Tony stared at the empty glass in his hands.   
How could this ever have happened?  
And then he thought what he had thought over and over these last few days: He would rather stop another alien invasion, fight an army of robots, carry a nuke through a portal into space or blow up another meteorite than keep fighting this fight. He would rather face every criminal on this planet than fight his friends for one more day. Too bad he didn’t have this choice.   
Tony filled his glass.  
He should really stop drinking.


End file.
